The art of positive choices helps you to create the life you want. Positive choices help you to discover what truly makes you happy and realign your priorities. Life is a series of additions and subtractions. You control the calculator.
—Gail McMeekin
“The Five Love Languages” by Gary Chapman makes the New York Times best selling list for the 30th week. Let’s take a look at why “The Five Love Languages” is so popular. Does this book deliver what it promises?
I would like to give my personal account of “The Five Love Languages”. I was first introduced to this book about a year ago by a friend. She actually let me borrow her audio version of it and gave me a copy of the language profile questions for me and my husband to take. We answered the test questions to determine our love language and listened to the CD. I have to admit that getting past his southern drawl was a bit challenging (even though I am also from the south), but worth it. However, we didn’t really put the effort into it that it called for. I was just very skeptical that each person can be boiled down into one main love language. I’ll talk more about each language in just a minute.
Fortunately, I have recently been given the opportunity to give this material a second chance. I am going through “The Five Love Languages” on DVD (a recorded seminar) and the “The Five Love Languages” workbook with a group of Christians. I have to say it has made a huge impact on our marriage this time around…. Seeing the results has stamped out my skepticism.
According to Gary Chapman the filve love languages are:
As Chapman goes into depth with each one of these we learn that what makes one person feel loved is not necessarily what makes another person feel loved. This information is so relevant in marriages. Most of the time our spouse “speaks” a different love language than we do. What happens is we speak the language to our spouse that is our main love language because that is what WE want and need in order to feel loved. Our spouse does the same for us with his/her love language. However, since we usually have a different language then often times we both go “unloved” even though we are trying. Knowledge of the love languages is key.
“The Five Love Languages” contains a test that both you and your spouse can take to determine your love language. After taking the test and reading the book, and learning exactly what each love language is you then can easily learn to speak your spouse’s love language and vice versa. Then you will both feel loved. Practicing the advice and seeing the results has put aside all skepticism I once had about this book. If you follow Chapman’s advice, this material has the potential to dramatically improve your marriage for life.
The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate
Five Love Languages, Member Book, UPDATED
Looking for happiness and meaning in life?
Happiness comes from spiritual wealth, not material wealth… Happiness comes from giving, not getting. If we try hard to bring happiness to others, we cannot stop it from coming to us also. To get joy, we must give it, and to keep joy, we must scatter it.
What is leadership? Is it necessary? Do you have to be happy in order to be a leader? Or do you have to be a leader in order to be happy? These are all good questions. I had a discussion with my husband last night about what leadership is. I used to have the belief that some people were born to be followers (myself in particular) and that they should stay that way and that some were born to be leaders. While I still think we are all born with natural tendencies one way or the other I think it’s necessary for all of us to develop leadership skills and attitudes in many respects at least. The more I studied leadership and what it is I soon realized it is about character and integrity and taking responsibility. Are these necessary for living and for happiness??? That’s up to you to decide…
General Colin Powell, a very wise and successful American leader has a lot to say about leadership. This is just one of his lessons he taught on leadership.
“Being responsible sometimes means [making people mad].”Good leadership involves responsibility to the welfare of the group, which means that
some people will get angry at your actions and decisions. It’s inevitable if you’re honorable. Trying to get everyone to like you is a sign of mediocrity: You’ll avoid the tough decisions, you’ll avoid confronting the people who need to be confronted, and you’ll avoid offering differential rewards based on differential performance because some people might get upset. Ironically, by procrastinating on the difficult choices, by trying not to get anyone mad, and by treating everyone equally “nicely” regardless of their contributions, you’ll simply ensure that the only people you’ll wind up angering are the most creative and productive people in the organization.
This is a quote I just came up with. Part of the quote is from an Earl Nightingale CD I just listened to.
I believe he was quoting from Dorothea Brande in Wake Up and Live
Dream of things that others would consider impossible, believe as though they are already a reality, and act as though it were impossible to fail.
Wherever you go, no matter what the weather,
always bring your own sunshine. - Anthony J. D’Angelo
Along our journey to finding happiness we must not forget that taking care of our health is crucial. It’s definitely the time of year when everyone is thinking about their health and how to lose weight and take better care of themselves. Some people have probably already given up on their attempts to be healthier this year. Some are still going strong.
The thing to remember is that living healthy is a lifestyle change, not a diet. Diet implies something temporary. Being healthy is about replacing old bad habits with new good habits. The great thing is that when we form new good habits then they basically become second nature to us and we feel good all the time. It’s a permanent change and a wonderful one.
The authors purpose of this book is to show us ways to retard or slow down aging. While this book can be a little corny with it’s cartoons and has a “busy” feel to it it gives ways to take care of our bodies. It first gives us knowledge into how the different systems in our bodies work and then explains to us what they need in order to be at their prime and last longer while preventing disease. I think we can all say that we would all like to prevent cancer and other diseases. Some topics of discussion are foods with specific health benefits, supplements and exercise. I particularly like learning how our bodies work and knowing what specific foods do to keep them running optimally.
Let’s make a lifestyle change for the better!!!
USA Today breaks the news:
In Amazing Spider-Man #545 last week, Peter and Mary Jane make a tearful deal with the devil-like character Mephisto: In exchange for saving Aunt May’s life, Mephisto erases all traces of the Peter-Mary Jane marriage from memory.
In the issue out this week, subtitled Brand New Day, Peter Parker returns to his roots — young, nerdy and single. Aunt May is alive and well and Mary Jane is again just part of the cast. The marriage never happened.
What’s up with this? Marvel can’t erase a 21 year marriage just like that. Or can they? It’s the comic world. I guess they can.
I know that many people would like to erase their marriage from existence. Sad…. What if instead we just erased our own selfishness. What if both partners just focused on what their spouse wanted instead of what they wanted. It happens over and over again that when this is put into practice - when someone focuses on pleasing their spouse that somehow their needs end up getting met too. How this world would change if we all practiced some humility - it’s a win/win situation.
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